Real me, Fake me

I love you
I hate you
Please don’t go
Get out and stay out
You’re my best friend
Don’t ever talk to me
Is this all a game to you love?
Is this supposed to mess me up more then I already am?
You tell me to be who I am
You tell me to stand up for myself
But when I do you say
You hate me
You tell me to get out
You say not to talk to you
I try to grasp this page that you constantly turn to
But can never keep a hold of it.
Is this how you get your jollies?
Is this how you get your laughs?
By taking a broken girl aside and breaking her all the more?
I try on so many faces.
I put on so many smiles
My sparkling eyes aren’t mine
My little giggle is oh so face
All for you thought.
When you see this fake face
My borrowed smile
These stupid sparkling eyes
You smile and say
I love
Please don’t go away
You’re my best friend
And when you hear that fake laugh
The laugh that covers it all up
You hug me and call me that stupid little nickname and say
You’ve changed me in so many ways
But when my real face shows
My secret smile tells you that I hurt in side
And those stupid eyes stop sparkling
You frown and say
I hate you
Get out
Don’t talk to me
Then when my laugh dies, you just push me away
I don’t understand, I don’t get it
When I’m false you love me
When I’m real you hate me
Is this just a game?
Is this just a way to break me?
I don’t understand, I don’t get it anymore.
please help me out